


For You

by nightfallgoddess



Category: Shadowhunters (TV)
Genre: Angst, Confessions, Drinking blood, Look don't tell me that Jace and Simon did not feel something after that scene, M/M, mild violence
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-04-08
Updated: 2017-04-08
Packaged: 2018-10-16 07:38:19
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,269
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10566666
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/nightfallgoddess/pseuds/nightfallgoddess
Summary: Simon finds Jace after the attack at the Institute and he begins to question himself.





	

He found Jace on the roof of the Institute, blonde hair blowing in the wind, as the last of the thunderstorm raged on. He was sitting on the ledge, his shoulders hunched.

Jace looked small...broken.

His feet move on their own accord, towards the shadowhunter with uncertain steps. In that moment, there was a need to stop what he’s doing, turn around, and forget everything. But he needs to know. Simon had to know why. 

Jace has never been his favorite person. Actually, Simon despised the guy. But what he had seen that night, what Jace had done for him, giving him his wrist, then sacrificing himself for the downworlders...for him.

 It changed something in Simon.

“Don’t you know by now, not to sneak up on a Shadowhunter, mundie?”  The familiar name for him didn’t have the usual bite Simon was so accustomed to hearing.

Jace turned his head slightly to him, but his face was still hidden in the darkness. It blanketed half his face, showing half a face...half a soul

“Mundie? Really? I thought we were passed that.” Simon sat down next to the blonde. His feet dangled over the ledge, hitting the roof with small thuds.

Simon could feel Jace’s eyes on him. He slowly turned his gaze up, turning to the silent man next to him. He was met with uncertainty, confusion, and something else that Simon couldn’t quite figure out the rest.

“Why did you do it?” Simon asked softly.

He had to go straight into this. No tiptoeing around the unspoken words, the very want to forget. If his heart could beat, it would be pounding wildly in his chest in that moment. Jace didn’t answer.

He kept looking at him like he was seeing Simon for the first time. Simon let him look. For the first time, he felt something pull at his chest while those mismatched eyes bore into him with something more than annoyance.

All the hard lines and strong jaw seemed softer in those languished moments. Simon tore his eyes away, face burning from the unexpected thoughts. He picked at the dried blood on his jeans from where Valentine had been more than rough with him.

He felt himself shudder as he remembered the coldness of the sword to his throat, the sting of flesh being cut, the warmth of blood pouring down his neck. Those moments of fear had been nothing he had ever experienced before. He hadn’t been ready to go, then. To leave the people in his life: Clary, Luke, his mother, Rebecca...but then Clary, or rather Jace, came rushing in.

At that point, all he could hear was the rushing sound of the blood leaving his wounds. He had been in a point of unconsciousness, but not quite there. He could still remember the flash of red hair appeared next to him and a wrist to his mouth egging him to drink.

He had refused. He couldn’t ever fathom drinking from his best friend. What if he drank too much, unable to stop the alluring need for more, killing her? But the wrist kept forcing, and the soothing voice encouraged, and he was too weak to refuse.

The blood had hit him all at once like a tidewater of pleasure. He hadn’t wanted to stop.  Euphoria was all Simon could describe it as. Utter euphoria. It was more than lust though, more than anything Simon had ever felt before. 

It was that strangled moan that had stimulated the aggressive need for more. But before he could relish in it, strong hands had tore him apart. 

Then he saw him. Jace. Red hair turned into blonde and green eyes turned into blue and brown. Jace had looked at him in surprise, his lips, red, as if he’d been biting them. His cheeks had also been flushed, and Simon had wanted to lean into it, to take what he so much wanted. 

“I did it for Clary,” Jace finally answered, breaking into Simon’s thoughts. His voice sounded hoarse and uncertain.

Simon nodded after hearing this, because it made perfect sense. Jace would save him because Clary cared about him. But he wondered, if Clary was never apart of the equation, would Simon be a dead man right now?

“Oh. Right. Of course,” he stammered. He didn’t know why but he felt a little disappointed? Maybe because he wanted to matter enough to someone without Clary being the reason for it.

He turned back to Jace, forcing a small smile on his face.

“I-I just wanted to say thank you. For saving me. I’m sorry...if I drank too much.” Simon’s eyes instinctively looked down at Jace’s wrist, which was now covered with multiple cuts and bruises from his fight with Valentine. But somehow, Simon could still pinpoint the exact place his teeth hand sunk themselves into the skin.

Jace followed his gaze, then pulled his sleeves down, covering the punctured marks.

 “It’s fine. I’m fine.”

“You don’t look fine,” he pointed out. “What happened before, Valentine tricking you, that was-you didn’t deserve that. No one should have that many deaths on their conscious,” Simon found himself saying, honestly.

Simon watched as Jace seemed to go through an inner struggle on how to respond to what he had said to him. 

“I should have known. I believed him...fell for his lies so easily,” Jace berated himself.

“No. Valentine is good at what he does. He’s good at twisting half truths and forming lies that seem real. Any of us would have believed him.”

Storm clouded eyes found his among the hurt and pain, and Simon felt closer to this person next to him that he ever thought was possible. Jace had seemed to easy to read when Simon had met him. A cocky asshole who seemed to always make Simon feel like being human had been something to be ashamed of.

But in front of him, he couldn’t find that person. This person was unsure of himself, in pain, and confused, and all Simon wanted to do was wrap his arms around him.

He found himself inching closer to the blonde.

“It’s not your fault, Jace.”

Silence carried itself on the back of the wind, causing him to shiver as it filtered through his hair. He hadn’t gotten what he wanted, but he felt like he had received something even more. A moment of understanding. Seeing someone for the first time.

Simon pulled himself up and  turned around to walk back into the Institute. A hand stopped him. He looked down at Jace’s hand wrapped round his wrist, the same hand that he had fed from. He could feel it’s heat.

“I would have done it again.” The hand squeezed lightly. “For you,” Jace said.

“What?”

Jace removed his hand. “You asked me why I did it,” he explained. “It was for you. Not Clary. You.”

Simon blinked. In that moment he was thankful for the darkness as blush traveled to his neck. Had Jace meant what he thought he meant? Simon was afraid to ask. as he looked at those unwavering eyes.

So he simple nodded and smiled, unsure of what to say or do. Jace was saying something, but Simon wasn’t sure he was willing to take the risk of getting hurt. 

For now, things would have to wait. He was with Clary, he was alive (well kind of) and well, and he was still learning to be who he was. 

Before leaving through the door, he turned around, saying, “Thank you."

But Jace had already turned back to the storm.

**Author's Note:**

> This was a random little drabble I came up with after daydreaming about jimon.


End file.
